Understanding the Purpose and Power of Men

Male-Female Differences

they neglect their husbands‘ sexual needs because they claim they are too busy serving God. Some women may even think it is not ―spiritual‖ for them to engage in physical rel a tions — perhaps because of the way they were brought up. These views are erroneous and can be a damaging witness to a husband. Sex was pa rt of God‘s original design for huma n ity, and it is a holy thing between a husband and wife. Men and women must balance having their own needs fulfilled with showing consideration for one another. The Bi ble says that husbands and wives are to fulfill one another‘s sexual needs (1 Cor. 7:3 – 5). It also says that a husband is to be sensitive to his wife‘s overall needs, treating her with co n sideration and respect. (See 1 Peter 3:7.) While one of the male‘s primary needs is s ex, one of the female‘s primary needs is affection. If these two interrelated needs are not lovingly understood and balanced, they can cause some of the worst conflicts in a marriage. The woman‘s natural focus is on the sensory, intuitive, and emotional realms of life, and this is why she has a cor responding need for affection. She needs an atmosphere of affection in order to feel loved and fulfilled. Men and women need to understand that affection creates the environment for sexual union in marriage, while sex is the event. Most men don‘t realize this, so they immediately go after the event. They don‘t know what it means to create an environment of affection. In stead, they focus only on their own needs. Yet affection is something the man has to initiate. If a man is not sure how to be affectionate, he should sit down with his wife and ask her — gently and sincerely. Affection is the environment in which to grow a wonder ful marriage. Giving affection to a woman means appealing to that which makes her an emotional being. Sometimes a woman just wants her husband to sit with her, hold her hand, and talk with her. Her need can also be met by plenty Affection creates the environment for marital union. The Female’s Need for Affection

189